This entire fiasco really weighs on my heart. It actually makes me angry because I cannot do anything about it. Not at God but whenever these things happen, I have to work or go to school and in this case, I have to work tonight and both parents are gone which means, once again, I am stuck at home trying to take care of this lamb. This also provides me time to think. Well, not really, but at least try to hold back the tears and focus on other things.
The things I was focusing on today, and honestly every other time that this has happened, was Christ and what the lamb symbolizes. There's a lot that a lamb symbolizes but this particular time, I was thinking of the state that Christ was in on the cross. We have a lamb outside that is very healthy and lively. He is very energetic and wants to play. Bear with me for a second when I say that it's as if this lamb is a depiction of Christ on the earth. I know, stupid comparison but that's what I think of. He's all happy and playful but then my thoughts shift to the lamb down in the basement. He is weak, frail, and cold. It breaks my heart to think that this little lamb is dying. I was holding him in my arms, rocking him back and forth, trying to feed him but to no avail. In this little lamb, I see Christ on the cross. Christ in his weakest state. My thoughts were brought back to why He was hanging there. How His mother felt. How heavy her heart was to see her only Son and the Son of God up on the cross and her not being able to to anything about it.
The Passion of the Christ came to mind. I do not know if any of you have seen it much less have any desire to see it or feel that it is blasphemous but to me, it is a gut-wrenching ideal picture of what happened. You can not only envision it in your mind while reading, but you also have a greater depiction of it by seeing it through Mel Gibson's eyes.
I apologize for this being so jumbled. It's been very difficult for me to think as I have my thoughts shifted elsewhere down in the basement where the little lamb resides. I just typed this up with really no thought or input. I just let this post flow. What I took away from this is my realization of how important and how real the death of Christ was and how it affected everyone He loved and everyone that loved Him not just at that very moment 2000 years ago but now 2000 years later.
Praise the Lord this is not the end. It is far from being over!